The here and now …

I got an email asking me to please think about posting again but I’m still unsure of how I feel about posting. Hayley’s life is more and more her own each day. I still talk about adoption regularly and about how we are managing ours but again there are more people involved that I don’t want to harm or complicate matters with.

Hayley is growing like a weed and doing well. She’s ten now and really well-adjusted these days. Her grades are very good, she’s still playing sports and she’s funnier and smarter every day I think.

Our adoption is still open but it is more driven by her desires now that what I feel we ’should’ do. I’m one of those people who gets stuck in the ’shoulds’ sometimes and I had to step back, with the help of Hayley and her therapist, and make sure I’m hearing what she has to say about the level of contact with her birth family. She is able to actually express how she feels about things pretty well - I’m very proud she is able to put her thoughts and feelings into words at this age. She’s happy, she doesn’t want to lose anyone and she knows they are there so she’s freed from some of her worries.

We continue to grow and learn all the time about ourselves as parents and the stewards of this journey with Hayley. She teaches us a lot too.

I love her and we are all fine. Thanks for asking.