Recharging

Inspiration can come from such unusual sources. We went to the beach to stay with my old college roommate last week. Mind you, we’d spoken some on the phone but hadn’t seen each other in almost 17 years. We were both quirky and blunt college kids when we were young; we met rushing a sorority together and became friends during the pledge and initiation periods.

We had a wonderful time and she is a great host. Her son is just adorable and smart as a whip. We went to the beach, the pool and the latest opened N.C. Aquarium (June 06). It was really fun to be with another parent who enjoys the learning process with their kids and it was neat to feel that friendship come back so easily.

When we talked over the phone before the visit, we’d talked a lot about adoption. She was adopted when she was very young and while the kids played, she was able to really give me a sense of things Hayley will face. Things I never imagined she would have to deal with came up and I’m grateful to have heard them. She even opened up some to Hayley, who was really astonished to her what she had to say. I know it gave Hayley some comfort that others have been through adoption issues. And I think my friend was pleased to hear a child talk so openly about adoption and her birth family. My friend praised us on how we were handling adoption issues - which was nice to hear because I know she never bothers to BS people.

From Adam Feigen

American Express today announced the top 25 project ideas selected as semi-finalists for The Members Project (www.membersproject.com), the unique online initiative that allows Amex Cardmembers submit ideas to make a positive impact in the world. It is increasingly apparent that Cardmembers are passionate about championing for Foster Children. For every Cardmember that registers through August 5, American Express will donate $1 toward the winning idea with that innovative idea receiving at least $1 million and up to $5 million to make it a reality.

Help gather votes for Foster Children! Please let me know if you would be interested in posting this item on your site.

For more information log onto www.membersproject.com to “Register to Vote” and help the Foster Children idea receive the funds it deserves.

Our webkinz blog has taken off. It started climbing over the past few weeks, hitting about 600-800 page views a day. Then the past week has been a new high almost every day. Friday - 1,300 page views… Saturday - 1,800 page views and then today a whopping 4,733 page views and one post with 350 comments alone. Hayley is so excited by it all, she predicts page count totals each day.

Evidently parents are cool with their kids on the blog b/c it is overseen by a mother and the kids like to trade object through the blog, not to mention get hints, etc. I’ve had so many nice posts from parents. One told me that their kid had read more of our blog than the combination of all the books he cracked - and the parent thought it was awesome because the kid was happy to read it, looking for tips and such. At this rate, Hayley might be near the same levels in terms of how much she has written or work on this summer.

Hayley loves posting on it. She is now comfortable with taking a screenshot, cropping and saving it in photoshop, then ftping it to our server and posting it in the blog with some text. I helped her but she typed her first line of straight html on Friday. She can now copy an img src line and edit it to call a different image. How cool is that??

I’ve even got some of the regular kids to start their own blogs and helped them with some basic html stuff. I like interacting with them all this way.

I fear Hayley will never be the kind of kid who likes schoolwork. So far, she doesn’t have the focus of Jeff or the curiousity about things that I had but that doesn’t mean there aren’t things and ways of learning that she won’t excel in. She could be a late bloomer anyway but knowing she can do something - something most kids can’t - is really good for her self-esteem and her academic skills. Perhaps she is a graphic learner and will use visual things to illustrate her work. She might be a photographer, a graphic designer, a fashion designer, an architect, who knows. But as Jeff said tonight, we just need to play to her strengths and go from there. And right now, her unabashed love of webkinz tops the list.

Calm after the very mild storm

I was jarred from my sleep this morning by a petulant child who was mad her father was making her eat some strawberries with breakfast. She knows better than to wake me up on a weekend morning, I like to sleep and Jeff gets up early anyway. So he is in charge and I won’t override him.

I rolled back over and listened to her complaint for a minute and then said again, talk to dad. And then I went right back to sleep. I heard her half-stomp downstairs but went back to my blissfully rest for another hour.

I woke up ready to walk into the tornado. When she starts up in a bad mood that early, it can be a tough day. But I came down to a quiet Bach concerto and the duo working on their 1,000 piece Mona Lisa puzzle she picked out. They’ve been working on it for about a week. I love it when they find a nice activity to share, especially ones that can help her quiet her mind and focus.

They were charming when they grinned up at me as I came down the stairs. I smiled and went on with my morning in a relatively peaceful way. I’m still holding my breath but I’m more optimistic than I was early this morning.

Yank

I was thinking about how quickly time was going by these days. Things are taking a turn for the better in general, the new meds seem to be helping, at least in the short term. In her last swim meet, Hayley had two sixth places, two fourths, a third and then she won her heat in the butterfly!

To counter balance the good news, Hayley has some upcoming medical stuff with her toenails. When she came to us her toenails had odd striations, peeling layers and in grown in some places. Her teeth were pretty bad as well - four cavities to file and caps already on her front teeth. Somewhere along the line, a lot of things got missed. We did all the repairs on her teeth quickly but we hoped the toenails would get better with well fitting shoes, good hygiene and care with a good diet.

It helped some but not enough so we went to the doctor. She said that normally we might have had a chance to heal them with taking care of them but that they were too far gone with neglect for us to have fixed it. She thinks Hayley might have mild psoriasis which caused the striping but that the issues were too far reaching otherwise. So as soon as swim team ends, they’ll take off both toenails. It should be at a least a week before school starts and good few weeks before soccer. It’ll take six months to grow them back in but they shouldn’t hurt anymore about 3-4 days after they come out. She is taking it well - as well as a nine year old can about getting a shot in her toe and losing two nails.

I’m not interested in pointing fingers, I’m just sad for her. I’m sad she’s had to go through so many emotional and physical issues at this age that most kids never will.

Confidence restored

The monkey is a happy glowwing kid again. Four days of sports achievements has her feeling excited and chipper again.

–First, Hayley played her first round of golf (even if it was a modified best ball one) on Thursday. She had so much fun and was dying to play even more when I had to drag her off the course. I told her there was no pressure here, just have fun and she did.

–Thursday night the swim team finished the weather delayed Thursday and won again! She swam well but had to swim up in some main events because of some absences from her age group (there are ten girls in 9-10, four kids in a main events/eight in a relay - and she is the youngest kid in 9-10). When they win at home, they get to jump in the pool to celebrate and boy did they have some fun doing that, lol. They are now 3-0 on the season (4-0 if you include the mock warmup meet). Hayley loves winning.

–Friday she went to the U.S. Women’s Open with my folks and had a lot of fun. I don’t think she would have enjoyed it as much if she hadn’t just been at golf camp. She and my folks got interviewed by a reporter for a story in the Wilmington Star-News!

Chapel Hill resident Gordon Perry, a PGA teaching pro (”now retired,” he added with a knowing nod), his wife, JoAnne, and granddaughter Hayley Hillison had just settled into a shady spot just off the 15th tee.

“We’ve been coming year after year,” Gordon said. “Coming in at No. 1 is more impressive.”

The Perrys said they had found their spot for the day, which was just fine with 9-year-old Hayley, who took her first golf lesson last week.

“I hit it about 100 yards,” Hayley said. “I think it’s pretty cool to watch them. It’s my first time.”

And in the end, even at the far reaches of the course, it’s about the golf. Annika Sorenstam’s putt for par drew the largest ovation.

“I’m coming to watch Michelle Wie,” Hayley said matter-of-factly. “And I came to watch the girl in the pink. But I can’t remember her name right now.” (It’s Paula Creamer.)

–Then Saturday she had her tryout with the other soccer program I found that had a challenge tryout. If you remember, I was very conflicted about letting her tryout but she wanted to do it.

Totally different result even if it was hotter than heck. We didn’t even leave the tryout before the coach offered her a slot on their U10 Challenge team (challenge is the next level up from recreation ball, they train twice a week for 90 minutes and play each weekend around the area as well as some travel tournaments). They use more of an academy format for challenge which turns out seems to be a pretty good format as I’m learning about it. Turns out she knows two girls on the team, so she is just over the moon thrilled. I feel like I did the right thing. I know she’ll have to deal with disappointments in life and she did handle the first misstep but she is nine and she’s been through a lot. If I can find her opportunities for HER to excel, then I’m going to do it every time.