We are trying hard to mitigate these rage cycles. They start over nothing important and she can’t seem to stop once she gets started. We’ve talked a lot afterwards and she cries as she apologizes and clings to me. She tells me she can’t stop.
Monday has us going back to the psychiatrist to work on her medications. I’ve talked to her former therapist, about finding a new therapist to handle some more therapy. I love her, she is one of the most amazing person I’ve ever met in my life. She is a fantastic therapist with a refreshing sense of humor and great way of working with kids (and parents). I could never do her job.
She listened to me choke up and blubber out what was up for an hour and we aren’t even a client of hers anymore. Of course, she faxed me names of therapists and more info, told me books to get and even sent a book for Hayley to read which arrived today (The Storm in My Mind).
Most of what she does is just listen and let people vent, cry or whatever they need to do. Then she helps you focus on where to go from here. I knew some of what she was going to say and of course, she wasn’t saying anything for sure, just trying to direct me towards what to look for in terms of more resources. It wasn’t a shock, I’d heard that it was a probable diagnosis from the psychiatrist and matched up the symptoms in the books I’d read.
We aren’t rushing to it, I find diagnosis of a specific mental health term can be limiting. No one medication can help with all problems. A diagnosis can help you categorize a group of symptoms, give a doctor an idea where to start but you still have to treat the PERSON, not the term. Medicine can’t solve it all anyway, we still have to help her LIVE, help her thrive as a person with the medication.
Bi-polar. Bi-polar. There, I’ve said it. That is what I suspect she has. She is already taking a medication that has some efficacy with that but I think we’ll have to change the quantity or type. Some of you mind not like labeling but that isn’t what I’m doing. I want to get her the best help we can, we are pursuing medical management, therapeutic and life adaptations for this. We intend to approach this as holistically and with as much respect for who she is as a person, with as little medicine as we can give her to help her be the person she can be.
In a sign from the universe, a wonderful teenager Hayley and I love, recently told me that she has ADD and bi-polar, which is what I suspect will be Hayley’s diagnosis. She is a well adjusted normal teen with friends, she is bright, athletic and sure of herself - and comfortable with her mental health enough to share and even offer to talk to Hayley about taking medicine. She was diagnosed at the exact same age, even in the same class with same teacher that Hayley had this year. I exhale when I think of this young lady and I hope we can do for Hayley what this young lady’s parents have done for her.
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To my friend Jen, thanks for posting your kind thoughts. I wish the best for you and Noah!
