Starting nine off with a bang!

April 30, 2007

It is 12:33 and Hayley is now nine!

We had a small ice cream cake at home since we had Uncle Jay here this weekend and Uncle Jay is the ice cream eating champ. It has been an ongoing birthday party since we went to the theatre to see HS Musical Thursday. Her big party is Saturday with gulp - 28 kids!


Ornery little sprite :)


Braided pigtails and red face from soccer - when did she grow up?

A note to her birth family members - please feel free to call tonight. She’ll be home after soccer practice about 7:30.


NC House Bill proposes adoption law changes

April 30, 2007

Roberta MacDonald passed this on to me to post and I’m thrilled to have this all spelled out.

Roberta MacDonald, North Carolina State Representative American Adoption Congress, Chairwoman NC Coalition for Adoption Reform Durham, NC

House Bill 445 (HB445) a bill granting adult adoptees (18 years or older) and the adult lineal descendants of a deceased adoptee access to their original birth certificates (OBC) will have a House Judiciary I committee hearing on May 1 at 10:00 a.m. in Room 1228 at the Legislative Building Raleigh. North Carolina started closing adoptee access to their original birth certificates in 1949.

This bill is based on Oregon legislation (Ballot Measure 5 8) that has been in effect since 2001. Oregon law allows an adult adoptee access to their OBC. It also provides a mechanism whereby birth parents may indicate their preference for contact by filling out a contact preference form. This form gives a birth parent the option of being contacted directly, contacted through an intermediary, or not contacted at all by an adoptee. According to the Oregon Department of Human Services, as of May 31, 2005, 8,486 adoptees had ordered a copy of their OBC.

The Oregon system appears to be quite successful in balancing the rights of adoptees and birthparents regarding their desire for contact. One of the most interesting things to come out of Oregon’s new adoption law is the number of contact preference forms filed by birth parents requesting no contact. On the fifth anniversary of the law’s implementation, only 83 birth parents had asked for no contact. It is clear that after the initial influx of no contact requests, the numbers have dropped dramatically. This number also indicates that a significantly low percentage of birth parents requested no contact out estimated tens of thousands of adoptees eligible to request a copy of their OBC.

The bill being proposed in NC would become law in January 2008 after passage. If you are interested in attending please contact the individuals listed below. All are encouraged to contact NC legislators or submit letters to the editor to express their support for this adoptee access bill.

Representatives Margaret Highsmith Dickson, W.A. Wilkins an adoptive father, James Crawford and Jean Farmer-Butterfield are the four primary sponsors of the bill. The text of House Bill 445 can be found at the following website: http://www.ncga.state.nc.us/Sessions/2007/Bills/House/HTML/H445v1.html. For further information contact Roberta Macdonald at nccar@mindspring.com.

Roberta MacDonald - Reunited Adoptee
Chairwoman - NC Coalition for Adoption Reform
http://adoptionreform-nc.org
NC State Representative
American Adoption Congress
http://www.americanadoptioncongress.org/


Perseverance

April 27, 2007

Photos 4069, 4070, 4071 in a series from a soccer game this weekend:

Oh I’m faster than you and breaking away

OUCH (soccer ball to the stomach)

No, you will not stop me. I will keep on…

She is one tough kid …


Jesse Helms?

April 27, 2007

Often I stumble across something about adoption that I didn’t know. Would you believe that former N.C. senator Jesse Helms was a huge help to adoption in this country? I know for some of you that is gonna be hard to take (admit it, some of you just threw up a little bit in your mouth).

The right wing curmudgeon co-sponsorted the Helms-Landrieu Bill, which became the Intercountry Adoption Act of 2000 and helped get ratified the Hague Convention in Respect of Intercountry Adoption. Bastard Nation even worked with him and he delivered one of their statements to committee himself. The purpose of the bill was to create a more ethical situation for adopting child from overseas as well as create a structure for the process.

“This legislation also combats abuses in the international adoption process, such as misportrayal of medical conditions, exorbitant fees, child kidnapping, baby smuggling, and coercion of birth mothers.”

“This significant legislation is intended to build some accountability into agencies that provide intercountry adoption services in the United States, while strengthening the hand of the Secretary of State in ensuring that U.S. adoption agencies engage in an ethical manner to find homes for children,” said Sen. Jesse Helms, R-NC, a chief sponsor.

Who knew - Jesse Helms spoke out for Ethical Adoption. We still have a ways to go on the international and national front to ensure all adoptions are ethical, you can’t deny recognition of the Hague Convention rules was a step in the right direction.

Part of what might have been motivating Helms was that he and his wife adopted an older child from an orphanage here in N.C.

He doesn’t talk about it publicly — though doing so might make it harder for liberals to paint him as a stonehearted mossback — but conservative Republican Sen. Jesse Helms of North Carolina and his wife, Dot, adopted their son Charlie after reading about his Christmas wish.

“Long before Jesse got into politics, just before Christmas, a story appeared in the newspaper about an orphanage,” recounts longtime Helms friend Tom Ellis, a Raleigh, N.C., lawyer. “One of the children was at age 9 a little older than most of the others, and he said what he’d like for Christmas was a home and a mommy and daddy. Jesse and Dot read that story and said, `Let’s go talk to that little boy. We ought to adopt him.’”

“At the time he could barely stand,” Ellis says of Charlie, who suffered from cerebral palsy But three operations by the late Lennox Baker, a distinguished orthopedic surgeon, “made it so the boy could walk” and cemented the senator’s long involvement in battling that disease.

(from Insight on the News: A Capitol commitment to kids - Congressional families with adopted children, Nov 24, 1997, by Sean Paige)

Helms, now 85 and suffering from dementia and other physical challenges, lives in a convalescent home in Raleigh. You can say a lot of things about Jesse Helms’ tenure in the Senate but along with changing his mind about AIDS and working with Bono, this is one of those things he did get right.


AP: Father’s Mission

April 26, 2007

The father of a 9-year-old girl who was kidnapped, raped and murdered in Florida urged lawmakers in North Carolina - the state of her birth - to approve tougher penalties for child molesters. Mark Lunsford, whose daughter Jessica was born during the two decades he lived in Gaston County, urged support of a bill that would lengthen minimum prison sentences and require child molesters be electronically monitored for life after serving their sentences. “The system has failed me and our children, not just in Florida but across the country,” said Lunsford, who has lobbied for similar laws in about 20 states.

02/26/2010, that is the projected date Hayley’s abuser will leave prison. My stomach turns at the idea of his release.

I’m pretty much in favor of the changes Lunsford is asking for in N.C. I don’t have any faith that the sex offender registry really does enough to protect families. The registry is good to know where these previous offenders are so your child can avoid that house and that the offender has to live away from the immediate zones around children’s areas. However, not all offenders are not registering or updating their registries when they move. I would like to see a more structured monitoring system for the more serious sex offenders.

Prisons aren’t about rehabbing people extensively. I don’t think anyone can really be rehabbed at the same time as living in a very hostile environment - that said, they deserve the hostile environment for their crimes. I just don’t seem them coming out of prison really a changed person.

In N.C., the structured sentencing changes have ensured that despite overcrowding prisoners are not released just due to overcrowding - they will serve at least 85% of their sentence as a given. I would like to see a system that releases sex offenders into a controlled or halfway house setting that can ensure they are going to counseling and are slowly re-entering society.

I don’t want to think about Hayley’s abuser getting out of jail but I have to think ahead. We’ve talked to Victim Services to protect her as much as we can now with blocking his access to this county for our prisons or work crews, getting on the update list for his status, tracking down his prison records and more. We can still file information with the state that will affect the conditions of his post-prison life and I certainly will be doing that.


N&O: Adoptees seek open records

April 22, 2007

Under North Carolina law, the state keeps secret the original birth certificates of adoptees. Advocates want the legislature to change that, but their effort pits them against some long-held beliefs. Read more

Above is a link to a great article on the status of adoption records in NC. I’ve been asked before about my opinions and I’m generally in favor of allowing a process to let adoptees access their records. I do know some adoptees who have found their birthparents and had very negative situations occur but those are rare. Do we protect the minority of birth parents who placed in the past and wanted a close adoption to help the majority who wish for a chance to reconnect in the future? Do we make this law retroactive or just from now on? A lot of questions need to be answered before I have a firm opinion on what to do here in N.C in terms of legislation.

I do think at the very least they can start asking birth parents with adoptions NOW if they would like to be in a database that can be available for their children to contact them when they are 18 or older. I would also like to see an option for the adoptive parents to access that information before the child is 18 so they can re-establish contact if they want or if they need medical info.

I did find it odd that Hayley’s birth certificate was re-issued with us as her parents and her former birth certificate destroyed from ALL government databases - destroyed was the specific word used. I tracked down her first birth certificate, getting the local county that issued it to fax it to me before they pulled it from their records. Could there be a way to create a different birth certificate that includes both the child’s birth parents and adoptive parents? Being listed on her birth certificate is strange, I did not give birth to her and I don’t pretend that I do.

According to the article, the bill in progress no would “would set up a way for birth mothers to request contact or say they do not want it. The bills would allow birth parents to file a form, and could indicate they want contact only through an intermediary. The bill would allow for a birth parent to provide medical history whether or not a reunion is wanted.”

That sounds excellent to me. Rep. Margaret Dickson from Fayetteville is the main sponsor of the proposal. If you are in N.C., you might want to email her from her site (margaretdickson.com) and let her know your thoughts.


Easter brunch

April 22, 2007


Easter brunch, originally uploaded by michelle hillison.


sisters

April 21, 2007